Single Minded 16/01/06

Sorry for the lack of updates, essays and stuff are a byatch....

Oh God! There's LOADS of them.. and most of them are SHIT!*

What Ifs Maybes - Bromheads Jacket
Oh god! Another Leeds bands? Well these ones aren't too bad, with some extremely strange half-rapped lyrics creating a feeling of The Streets fronting an energetic punk outfit. Would get grating over the course of a full LP but in single form it comes across as a fun, knockabout 3 1/2 minutes (3.5/5)

Nasty Girl - Nortorious B.I.G. feat Every Rapper ever by the look of it.
More deradful identi-kit boastful c-Rap music from the man who's more prolific dead than alive. This is absolutely fucking dreadful. 2006 has already produced its worse single (0/5)

Jack U - Felix Da Housecat feat. P Diddy
You know things are bad when you're so bereft of ideas you need to draft in P.Diddy/PuffDaddy/P.Hiddely-Ho-Neighbourino to help lend some inspiration to your flat, half rate danceoffering. Diddy's shouting is quite possible the least convicing vocal in music history andhis half baked rapping is almost as bad. Lazy, dull, insiped... don't bother (1/5)

The Greatest - Cat Power
And so it comes to Cat Power to save us from a fate worse than Opeth, with her usual lilting piano melodies and hushed vocals combining to an even more devestating effect than sheusually manages. Sumptous strings too. (4/5)

Commercial Breakdown - The Sunshine Underground
Second slice of funky pop from the Leeds (again?) quartet, holds the attention for the duration but doesn't offer enough to make you want to find out anymore. Compared to someof the shite out this week though its 'Strawberry Fields Forever' A tad formulaic. (3/5)

Little Derek - Sway feat Baby Blue
Oh my god! A rap record with a 'featured' artist that actually adds to the song. Along with Plan B, Sway (the Mobo winning before he had a record deal rapper) is 2006's most promising rap newcomer. Here he shows why showcasing his lyrics and beats effectively, without quite setting the pulse racing the way early Dizzee Rascal did. Still one to watchthough (3.5/5)

What's Your Damage - Test Icicles
Screamy-noisy-guitary blend of everything funk pop, strectches a bit too close to the the aweful faux-American emo of Funeral For A Friend for this listeners liking, but passable enough for a band riding a band wagon. Also, it goes on FAR to long (2.5/5)

Twelve - Forward Russia!
Irritating live, irritating on record. Wire-y style power pop with neither the imaginationnor ability to sustain itself a bit of a waste really. Hmm.... anyone know how to do the upside down ! at the start of their name - that would be useful.. oh yeah, there is a nice little xylophone background bit too which raises the score half a mark. (2/5)

Super Heartbeats - The Motorettes
Rawk 'n' roll which would sound more at home in 70s New York than anywhere else. Not bad just seems a bit pointless as long as (Thank GOD!) the Ramones albums are still available (2.5/5)

Hi Tack - Say Say Say (Waiting For You)
Oh god! Of all the songs MJ and PM have done between them Hi Tack sample the cheesiestone available. It wasn't even the best MJ/PM duet for Fooks sake. Ah well, this dance-y effort is nice enough and fits in well with where the whole dance scene (except Vitalic)seems to be doing at the moment - the middle ground. (2.5/5)

Funny Little Frog - Belle And Sebastian
There is no way I can review this in an unbiased manner. This is a band so good they could cover 'The Kaiser Chiefs' and make it tender, heartfelt, vital and all the otherthings that other bands just can't do. They have crafted another 4 minute epic here instantly making everything else here seem largely irrelevant. Finely crafted pop perfection (4.5/5)

When The Sun Goes Down - The Arctic Monkeys
Oh hype, so much to answer for. You've taken a perfectly good northern take on The Libertines and fed them standards they can't match. Here's another spikey, guitar drivenanthem that does everything it says on the tin but won't change the world like some seemto think it will.Still, as good a single as many will manage this year. As George Michael once said - 'Listen Without Predjudice' Before spunking on a toilet wall, presumably(4/5)

New Years Day - Bedouin Soundclash
We already have one U2 we don't need them being covered by a Candian ska group. Urgh! U2's ONLY good song ruined for your dis-pleasure. (1.5/5)

Also Out This Week

Check On It - Beyonce.. Yawn. Is this really the same woman who gave us Crazy In Love (1/5)
Eddie's Song - Son Of Dork.. Sub-Busted pop punk (2/5)
All Time Love - Will Young.. More Jazz tinged pop from PopStars/Idols second best graduate (3/5)

SINGLE OF THE WEEK
Rather Predictably


Belle And Sebastian - Funny Little Frog [Rough Trade]

*John Cale has also released a download only single 'Outtathabag' today but I'm not PAYING to review something. P2P RULEZ!!

nOOb